Les Singes: The Life of Monkey Boy

Not The Situation Room

Something is wrong. Something is completely amiss with our political system. I have to say it's downright annoying me. Currently there's much debate about the health care reform. I'll just put it out there that I'm supportive of the President's health care plan and leave it at that.

During the President's speech last night some politician, purposely left nameless, decided it would be wise to burst out "you lie" when Obama discussed how illegal immigrants won't be covered under his health care reform plan. I'm not really sure this person shouting from his chair understands protocol, but whatever.

Here's what bugs me. The justice has been swift for this guy as he's already issued an apology to the President. I don't believe the guy has much integrity behind his words, but at least he apologized. Just before composing this blog entry I saw a Facebook Update how a "grassroots" campaign already raised $400,000 for this guy's future political opponent. This is all well and good, but part of me thinks our country is behaving like eight year old boys on a school playground. Can't we let this guy dig his own grave instead of all these knee jerk reactions? Giving him any extra press only rewards him for his outburst. My guess is someone stupid enough to say this has likely already ruffled plenty of feathers, making his re-election complicated.

The shouting out during the health care forums, ad campaigns created by MoveOn.org, boycott after boycott... will it ever end? I'm happy people feel so passionate about politics because they're important. However, I do think there needs to be civilty on both sides. Listen to the issues, speak when the other person is finished, take deep breaths, and realize how we're all in this together. This is our country to collectively improve so let's do it.

Brett Favre Moments

A change is happening. It's not happening as quickly as I'd like to see, but I feel butterflies waiting to emerge. It's akin to how I felt back in 2004 after completing first triathlon. The excuses I've used the past two years are gone. I'm a dad, now deal with it and move on. There's no reason I should be letting parenthood get in the way, if anything it should create motivation.

Sure there are some x-factors making training more difficult such as work and my training partner being in the Peace Corps, but there are many others who are able to manage this workload and train on their own. There's no reason I can't step it up and make that happen for myself.

Monday morning I will run a half marathon. This half marathon is sort of sentimental to me since I will be pounding the pavement on streets where I used to ride bikes as a youth. Five years ago this was my first sporting event after registering for Ironman Canada 2006. I was fresh off a trip to Canada to watch the Ironman and lo and behold I signed up for the damn thing. The adrenaline was pumping September 2005 when I ran 13.1 miles faster than I ever have before.

Perhaps I don't chat about my athletic pursuits much anymore because I'm ashamed of how inactive I've become the past few years. I figure there's no time like the present to correct this and shed a few pounds. While I will never be a professional triathlete or runner, there's something incredibly rewarding about completing a triathlon or run. The sense of accomplishment is etched in your mind. I can still recall the euphoria of finishing my first half marathon in a driving November rain storm. It's these memories I miss and will achieve going forward. I ask you to keep me honest folks. Don't cut me any slack as I come out of retirement for only the 18th time since September of 2006.

Brussel Sprouts Do Scare Me

Certain things do scare me: Mary Hart, not completing a blog post, brussel sprouts, knives, guns, little boys with red curly hair, and men who clip their fingernails at work... to name a few.

A couple years ago I'd be hard-pressed to create a legitimate fear list. However, I'm pretty sure this has changed. A couple years ago I become a parent and so it's fair to say I have new fears. Last week I turned on the TV late at night to unwind. Sprawled out on the couch, I found myself glued to an HBO documentary called Boy Interrupted. The documentary is about a mom who chronicles the life of her bipolar son with a video camera. It unfortunately has a tragic ending when the boy commits suicide at the age of 15.

I know, this isn't a fun topic. It did get me thinking about the fragility of life. I'm honestly very thankful to never know anyone to personally take their own life. I can't imagine how hard that would be for the victim, surviving family members, and friends. I've definitely experienced death first-hand having lost two siblings, but suicide is different.

In the two years since my daughter was born, I can tell you I have new fears. They're no longer simple fears about celebrities or food. The thought of something going wrong with my daughter's health or something more dramatic is unappealing I just don't want to think about it. Yet here I am blogging about the topic. She means the world to me. I've learned so much about myself as we raise our child. Last Friday night she threw up a few times when we got home from work. Saturday morning she turns to us and says, "mommy, I need to spit". The spitting action refers to her vomiting into a bucket. She took the whole being sick episode better than I would.

If you watch the news the headlines are inundated with horrible stories about children losing their lives early. Kids drowning, suffering a dog attack, getting lost in the woods, having a predator touch them, etc... these are things you hear about and hope like hell never happen to your own child. That shit freaks me out. I don't want my daughter locked in a cave. She loves all the people she interacts with at daycare, but I can see where a parent might want their child to never leave their sight. I'm not a parent that subscribes to the isolation theory. I want her to see as much of the world as possible since I think much of her growth hinges upon the people she meets who aren't her parents.

I would love to try and wrap this post up with a shiny bow, yet I haven't a clue where I'm going with this entry. I guess watching the documentary and seeing the family's raw emotions made my stomach sick. The stuff this family went through in hopes their boy would have a "normal" life is gut wrenching. I say compassion is key.

Let's Do This

A week ago today I was hanging out with my buddies for our second annual Mancation. It was an adventure, foreshadowing. Last year my wife coordinated the festivities with my friends as a surprise weekend getaway. It was extremely awesome as I had no idea it was happening and so giddy when my pals showed up at my house to whisk me away.

This year we didn't have the element of surprise going in our favor. We had a desire for five college friends to get out of town and relax. Last year we went mountain biking in Eastern Washington. This year we planned something similar on the Columbia River Gorge.

I took last Thursday and Friday off work and drive down to Portland with my amigo Jason. Thursday night we hung out in The Rose City and watched a soccer game with another friend from college. It was a really fun time and something I plan to do again.

Friday and Saturday we rented a sweet house on the Columbia River Gorge. If you've never been to the Columbia River Gorge, then put it on your list of places to see. It's quite a remarkable area. Our plans once again centered on mountain biking. Although fishing got thrown into the mix. I don't fish though, but I do drive a kickass Subaru so I shuttled the guys back and forth from the fishing hole to the house.

Saturday rolls around and I'm just not feeling the mountain bike thing. Call me a year older or just lazy, but we opted out of the mountain bikes. We sat around our portable electronic devices tagging each other in photos Saturday morning. Then we officially cancelled the bike reservation and had to find a new activity.

Disc Golf

For those not in the know, disc golf is golf with frisbees. This would be your chance to laugh. Five dudes in their mid 30s skip out on mountain biking to play disc golf instead. The course was nine holes, however we didn't play all nine even though it took us a good half an hour to find suitable playing "discs". We arrive at the disc golf park and at hole one there's a warning sign that says something like "see that crap near your feet, that's poison oak. It will be everywhere on the course so I hope you brought Calamine lotion". I may have embellished.

We saw the sign and for some reason decide to play a few holes. We lose one of our five discs on hole two and miraculously none of us contracts poison oak. After hole three we decide enough is enough. The course was overgrown and rather shitty. We thought we'd have a glamorous story to tell at the end of our Mancation 2009, but really... I can sum it up with the following keywords.

Basement ping pong, no fish caught, poison oak, watching kiteboarders, Hood River, portable devices, Leeroy Jenkins, coffee, beer, relationships, good friends, and scary toll bridge.

On the drive home Sunday I got stuck in really bad traffic, adding two hours to the drive. The Mancation wasn't nearly as awesome as the previous year, but it's not about the activities. It truly is about the company. I'm cool with just hanging out doing nothing, which is pretty much what we did for a couple days. It's hard to find time as adults to hang out with my college friends so this is what our annual gathering is all about, friends. Thanks for playing!

It Only Happens Once a Year

We've made it two years! Will I always remember her birthday as if it were yesterday? The smell of the hospital, the temperature that Sunday morning, things happening the weekend our daughter was born are still as clear as if they happened last week. You can see our bundle has grown to be quite the toddler. Heck, she's not even a baby anymore. She sings, she dances, she knows the difference between coffee and milk, she copies the actions of her parents, and most importantly she delights.

Baby Singe's arrival to this world wasn't smooth. My wife had to have a c-section to get our girl out of the womb. Her head was cone shaped, she weighed slightly under six pounds, we had to stay an extra day at the hospital, yet she was ours to take home. We took care of her during those first fragile weeks. I took a month off from work while my wife took off five to learn more about the girl who spent the previous 9-10 months growing inside her. We made it through the first year with a collective sigh.

Jump forward to August 5th, 2009 and I couldn't be prouder. I love our daughter so very much. She's already teaching me many things about myself much like her mom did when we first met. Well, I continue to get schooled by Mrs. Lessinges, but that's a topic for another day. Becoming a parent has been quite an eye opening experience. Every day evolves. Let me tell you this, I've had a blast this summer. The weather has been most remarkable in Seattle. We've spent the weekends learning and discovering all that our city has to offer. Many days I feel like a tourist in my own hometown, seeing many things for the first time such as the Filipino Festival a couple months ago.

In my college days I listened to a shock jock named Tom Leykis. He loved to rail against parents saying they have kids for egotistical reasons. While there may be some truth to his claim, there is a flip side... the payoff. Raising a child is not easy work, but I will say the work is definitely worth it in the long run. The first year was grueling. The second year has been a bit exhausting and trying. Watching an infant grow into a little person is one of the true wonders as they discover the world around them.

While I wrap up this post around 1:30am, I reflect back to the critical final hours in the hospital. I peered out the window, putting my hand in a box of Wheat Thins. Anything to calm my nerves and stomach as my wife endured very painful contractions. Out the window I could see the lights of the university's football field in the distance. It was a foggy night. In four short hours I would become a parent and my entire world enhanced. Baby Singes, we love you!

Alarm set for 5:18am on my cell phone.

Put an M Before the Word and Call it Good

People like to talk about the economy these days. It's sort of important I suppose considering how bleak things were a few months ago. I do feel like things have rebounded a bit, yet I'm not basing this on any scientific financial data. Hell, our house just appraised for $125,000 less than it did two years ago. Does it make me happy? Nope.

I mention the economy because it's been talked about ad nauseam. I think there's something to this though. As someone who was slated to be laid off at the end of January this year, I've survived layoffs. However, my new role at the same company is very challenging. There's lots of work to be done by fewer people. Those people, myself included, have much less time available for nefarious internet wanderings. I used to get home, chill out in front of the TV and read blogs for a couple hours. That's hardly the case anymore.

I don't take work home with me very often because my days in the office are chock full of work. The last thing I want to do at home is sit on the computer doing stuff for The Man. I'd rather tend to the family, the yard, or some other household tasks like folding laundry or killing wasps. It's a bit disheartening because I've lost contact with some great blogs and not by design. The wonderful thing about blogging is it's usually pretty easy to pick up where you left off.

To combat the challenge that is work we've planned our second annual "mancation". I know it's a cheesy name, but we're sticking with it. Last year's event was a complete surprise my wife slyly coordinated with my friends. We spent two nights in Eastern Washington doing little more than riding mountain bikes, drinking coffee/beer, and shooting the shit. It was my first true weekend away from my daughter. Since then I've been away from her a couple other times when I traveled to Toronoto for work last year.

So bring on the vacation. Oh, just in case your memory is shorter than the year is long, my wife went on a little surf adventure to Mexico earlier this year. I'm hardly leaving the state, but for four days I will be certain to leave work behind. That's what mancation is all about.

Holster Your Weapon

If things don't work out for me in my current line of work, I have some options. Consider the following.

a) I phoned the non-emergency number because I saw a man walking down the street with a gun on his right hip. It seemed very odd and out of place. The police said they'd dispatch an officer. I was told by a neighbor, who happens to be a prosecutor, within the city limits of Seattle it's not illegal to wear your holstered gun, provided it's registered and not loaded. I'm not really in the business of learning either facts.

b) I may have sent a text message to someone about litter in our streets. I get sort of pissy about rubbish not being properly maintained.

Both stories highlight a part of me that feels the need to get involved. Sometimes this is good and sometimes it's not so good.
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Weather, can you blog about the weather? Well I'm going to since it was 94 degrees in Seattle on Monday and it's supposed to be 97 on Tuesday and remain in the mid 90s through Thursday. Did you know bees love heat? I'm fairly certain we have at least one wasp nest in our attic. If I never see a wasp again, I will be okay with that. NOTE: I do love bumble bees and honey bees. Wasps are not my friends though.

Quiz: there are two cities in the U.S. that have never reached zero degrees and 100 degrees, that would be Fahrenheit. I'm sure you've figured out Seattle is one of those ciites. However, can you tell me the other one? The winner gets an iPhone sock.

Around Town: this weekend we will be celebrating my daughter's second birthday. Her birthday isn't quite next weekend, still I can't believe two years have ticked away. What has happened to me since then? What's up with my blog? Am I still doing triathlons? Let me answer the triathlon bit right away... I did one about a week ago and did alright considering my utter lack of training. The Chicago relatives in-laws will be here to join in the festivities. Our little girl isn't so little anymore. I wish you all well on this lovely Tuesday!

Monday Review

I'm not sure how it happens, but I'm in a bad streak of not paying attention. I probably forget to button my fly at least a couple times a day. 

Monda morning I put on a brown short sleeve polo tee with jeans. About an hour after arriving to work I realized the shirt was on inside out. Sweet! As a guy I was able to remedy the situation while sitting at my desk, a perk.  I really should pay more attention to my wardrobe selections.

The rest of Monday went off without a hitch, considering the fact I didn't inadvertantly arm the house alarm for the contractor fixing our windows. I did that last week and felt horrible because it's an irritating noise. Now he's got our digits so he best be a trustworthy guy.  Baby Singe loves him and makes sure to say hola and adios each day.   

Monday didn't contain any dropped coffee beverages, no water being spilled on my dress pants, and no recovery of lost goods. In short, Monday was Monday and I quite liked it. I had a burrito for lunch and a bottle of peach juice. Maybe a few donuts too, but they don't count. Bring on Tuesday!

I Love Humans

Okay, so maybe I borrowed the title of this post from a Facebook Status Update of mine earlier today. Sue me. This week has been a chaotic work week due to a three day onsite meeting. It was nice and all, but I feel as if I will be playing catch up for the next three weeks.

Anyways, I was sitting at my desk Friday attempting to clear my mountainous Inbox when my cell chirped. I didn't recognize the number, but I decided to answer. The voice on the other end says "Egan" with an inquisitive tone. I confirm it's me and the woman tells me she's got something for me.

Before I continue you need some background information. Rewind a month to an incident after work. I hopped in my car after exiting my brick building and drove down the alley between my office and daycare. I saw a oncoming car swerve to avoid striking something on the ground. Not sure what it was, I slowed down to get a closer look. Whoa, someone's shoulder bag was in the middle of the road. I pulled over, stuck it inside my car, and then went to retrieve Baby Singe from daycare. Once I got home I spent about 20 minutes carefully going through the bag seeking any sort of identification.

Eventually I was able to connect with the owner of the bag on the phone. We agreed to meet the following morning so I could return her shoulder bag. As usual, I was running late that day getting stuck behind a train. The lady met me in front of Starbucks and offered to buy me a beverage for my efforts. I didn't have time though since I still needed to drop off Baby Singe at daycare. I politely declined and didn't think I'd ever hear from the woman again.

That was until today when my cell phone rang. The lady wanted to meet with me to give me a gift. We met in front of the same Starbucks and she kindly presented a gift. It was a pink bag with a cute stuffed animal dog for Baby Singe. Color me impressed. My daughter loved the dog and we all go home happy. The lady said, "I haven't stopped thinking about you since that day". Only if....

I Need a Periscope

I'm nosey alright. Normally I can figure out situations/relationships in a timely manner. However, these days I've been confounded by our new neighbors. When our old neighbors moved to San Francisco, they opted to rent their house. It took a couple months, but they did find some (entertaining) renters.

The moving day happened and we met some of the new residents. I remember one name from the eventful day. I recall the loads of kids I met which included three older kids and 15 month old girl twins. Family and friends helped with the move and we were excited to meet the new neighbors.

Six weeks later I still don't have a full grasp on the family relationships. I will admit this bugs me more than it should. I know who the mom is. I'm pretty sure she's the parent of all three of the older kids aged roughly 8-11, two boys and a girl. I'm 100% certain she's also the parent of the 17 month old twins.

That's where my certainty ends. Here are the cast of characters:

Female who drives a Toyota Corolla: The woman is rarely home when the mom is there. She's roughly in her mid 20s and has some sort of accent, sounds Russian. At first I thought she was a babysitter. Then I thought maybe a sibling because she works really long hours. The newest theory from Mrs. Lessinges is this woman is an au pair.

Older male who drives a Scion xB: he introduced himself as the mom's boyfriend on their move-in day. This man is easily in his late 40s and I haven't seen a sign of this guy in the past three weeks.

Male with baggy pants who drives a beat up black Mercedes: this man is for sure the dad of the 17 month old twins. He visits the house regularly and will dropoff the kids there. On occasion he will stay with the kids there at the house. I can only assume he and the mom have joint custody of the toddler girls. He has stayed overnight a couple times. Age, mid 30s, baggy pants and avoids eye contact.

Male who pumps bass in his black sportscar: this man is about my age, in his mid 30s: I think this guy is the mom's new main squeeze. I think the older Scion guy has been replaced by this guy. He first appeared on the scene about a week ago when he arrived to the house at 12:45am. I would say that's booty call, but one never knows.

Noisy old guy: this man drives a Ford minivan and will take the older kids places. I assumed he was the grandfather at first. Lately though, I've had a change of heart. I believe he could be the father of the three older kids. This man wears suspenders and assembled their dining table in the wee hours of last weekend. Fun Fact: this man left as soon as the Bass Pumping guy arrived last weekend for his booty call.

Good luck sorting this out. Sadly, this is the exact type to occupy my mind far too often. Enjoy your Fourth!